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"Praise God! My identity is in Christ, not my sexuality" A Pastor's Son Struggled with the Gay Lifestyle, but God’s Truth Led Him Out“To some, it might have appeared like I had it all, but honestly, on the inside I was in despair, broken, and suicidal.” But in the depths of suicidal despair, his father—once again prompted by the Holy Spirit—called his son after they had not spoken in four years…
“Around the age of seven I felt a leading to give my life to Jesus,” George Carneal recounts in his book, From Queer to Christ: My Journey Into the Light. After professing his faith in front of the congregation, his father baptized him. Shy and effeminate, by fourth grade he was already being called names at school like “sissy,” “queer,” and “faggot.” He was picked last for sports teams. He preferred to hang out with the girls and jump rope or play jacks. As he got older, bullying became a constant. “I even got teased about the way I walked and carried my books (close to my chest).” School became a matter of survival for him. In high school Carneal dated a few girls, but shied away from any attempt at romantic intimacy. “My attraction was toward boys,” he admits, “but I didn’t understand why.” After graduation, he had his first relationship with another young gay man. After the two had dinner together for the first time, he was asked, “Are you gay?” “Yes, I guess I am,” he replied, his head spinning with the implications. As he came to grips with his feelings, his father went through a crisis at church and was voted down by the congregation and forced to resign. In response, Carneal walked outside, looked up at the sky, and told God he hated him. Why would Christians do this to my dad? he wondered. From that moment on, he decided to stay away from church and he went headlong into the gay lifestyle.
In Fort Lauderdale, he worked three part-time jobs trying to make ends meet. “I lived off cigarettes, pizza and baloney sandwiches,” he says. “Fed up with being broke, I decided to visit a known hustler bar to see if I could make some extra money.” Hearing God’s voice Working as a male prostitute, things sometimes got rough and even violent. One night as he was walking with friends toward a well-known gay bar, The Copa, God’s voice broke through. “It felt like the volume of everything else around me was suddenly lowered and I clearly heard these words whispered in my ear: If you were to die tonight would you go to Hell? Shaken, Carneal didn’t tell his friends, but he decided he would try to ignore the voice. Inwardly, a sense of angst was gnawing at his soul. “I was open to trying anything for excitement and looking to fill the void inside, only to find everything was unfulfilling,” he recounts. “I had been struggling with depression and couldn’t mask the pain with drugs and alcohol any longer.” He thought about suicide one night—and even held a bottle of pills in his hand… Click here to read what happened next. God Reports
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