"Why Didn't He Say Good-Bye?" Wife of Pastor Who Killed Himself Shares the Heart-Breaking Questions Her Children Are Now Asking Her

Will Maule : Sep 5, 2018
Faithwire.com

"These are questions a 5-year old shouldn't be asking. These are questions a 29-year old mommy shouldn't be answering. I hate that I can't protect them from their grief. I hate that the only way to move forward is to walk through it. There is so much unknown for all of us." -Kayla Stoecklein

(Chino, CA)—[Faithwire.com] The wife a California pastor who committed suicide last month has spoken out about the moment she had to reveal the devastating news to her three young children. (Image: Instagram/via Faithwire)

Pastor Andrew Stoecklein of Inland Hills Church in Chino, California, took his own life August 24 after battling with anxiety and depression.

"Telling the boys yesterday was the hardest thing I've ever had to do," Andrew's wife, Kayla, posted to Instagram yesterday. "It crushed me. Our oldest son Smith had the most difficult time processing everything. He is such a smart boy and is incredibly heartbroken."

Perhaps the most heartbreaking section of Kayla's update is when she detailed the questions asked by her three boys in the wake of their father's untimely death.

"The types of questions he asked really shocked me. "Are you and daddy still married?" "Did the doctors know daddy was going to die?" "Why didn't he say goodbye?" "What is my life going to be like without daddy?" she wrote. "These are questions a 5-year old shouldn't be asking. These are questions a 29-year old mommy shouldn't be answering. I hate that I can't protect them from their grief. I hate that the only way to move forward is to walk through it. There is so much unknown for all of us."

As for the future without her husband, Kayla admitted that it was nothing short of "daunting."

"This isn't the life I dreamed about, but I know God is with me," she noted. "This isn't the life I prayed for, but I know God will provide. This isn't fair, this isn't right, this doesn't feel real, but I know God is greater, stronger, and bigger. God is for me, with me, and beside me."

The heartbroken widow concluded: "He is wrapping His loving arms around me and my boys and reminding us even now that He has got this too"... Subscribe for free to Breaking Christian News here.

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