How One Woman Raised by Same-Sex Parents was "Saved by God's Relentless Pursuit"

Michael Ashcraft, Mark Ellis : Jan 13, 2015
God Reports

"I cannot pretend that [my mother's] decision to leave my father and raise me with another woman did not have long-term and devastating consequences for me. I am a casualty of same-sex parenting... Today I joyfully proclaim Christ as my savior and God as my father."

Raised by two lesbian mothers, Meg (not her real name) was an ardent feminist, gay rights and pro-choice activist who fully embraced moral relativism. (Photo via God Reports)

Seeing Christians who carried signs that proclaimed "God hates sinners" and "AIDS cures homosexuality" at gay pride parades, Meg seethed against Christians, believing them all to be characterized by hate.

But when she met her boyfriend's parents in college, the Christian stereotype shattered. "They were kind, thoughtful, loving, wonderful people who totally rocked my worldview of what Christians were like," Meg says.

Her curiosity piqued, she began attending church but spent most of the services crying because she kept thinking, "these people are so brainwashed," she recalls.

As she listened to sermon after sermon, she realized that part of her resistance toward God came from her own lack of a loving father.
"Because my relationship with my own (biological) father was so messed up, it actually grated against me to think of God as my father," she notes. "I was going through a huge period of seeking. I was ok by worldly standards—I got good grades, played sports, had friends—but I was a mess inside."

She criticized sermons. She resisted hugs from people in the church. She argued with church members, "but my heart was crying out for the truth," she recounts. "I put up a fight and resisted God's call on me. I was saved by God's relentless pursuit."

After marrying, Meg came to grips with the consequences of being raised by two lesbians, she says.

"It wasn't until my husband and I had children and I watched him with our kids that the full weight of what I'd lost with my own father hit me—and it hit me like a ton of bricks," she says. "Many people believe that so long as a child has two parents, gender doesn't matter. But it does. I shouldn't love my dad, but I do. I should love my 'other mom,' but I don't. I can't change that, though I've definitely tried."

Meg lost her biological dad before she could remember. He was a lousy father, Meg says, and her mom decided she was gay and wanted to pursue her own happiness with a lesbian lover. (Photo via Flickr.com)

"I love my mom deeply, fiercely, and unconditionally. She is an incredible woman," she says. "But I cannot pretend that her decision to leave my father and raise me with another woman did not have long-term and devastating consequences for me. I am a casualty of same-sex parenting."

"We have to recognize that all children of same-sex parents are being raised in brokenness. Something precious and irreplaceable has been taken from us. Two loving moms, or two dads, can never replace the lost parent. I was intentionally separated from my other biological parent and then told that 'all that matters is love' and 'love makes a family.' Love matters, but accepting and promoting same-sex parenting promotes the destruction of families, not the building of families.

"Do I wish my mom lived a miserable life married to a man she didn't love? No. I want my mom to be happy," she says. "But I also wish that she and my dad did love each other and that somehow it could have worked out. Her happiness cost me a great deal.

"Growing up without my dad colored everything about me. I had abandonment issues. I expected and feared that everyone close to me would leave me. Even as an adult I still grieve for what was taken from me."

Today Meg is happily married and attends a Christian church...

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