"God is Here, but I am Getting so Tired"; Syrian Christian Mother Mourns Killing of Children While Praying for Hope, Peace

Jerry Dykstra : Apr 21, 2014
Open Doors USA

"In our school we gathered the children to pray for the victims. I told the children: no matter what bad things are happening around us, our God is still good; even if we're in danger of death, our God is still good and worthy of praise. So we raised our hands and started worshipping God. The parents of one of our Muslim pupils were present while we did that, and they were so impressed they said: 'Our child is safe here. He is under the protection of God.'" -Hannah

(Santa Ana, CA)—Hanna is a Christian woman living in Damascus, Syria with her husband. She and her husband have two young daughters. Hanna works in a school. Over the last year Hanna has been pouring out her heart about what daily life is like in war-torn Damascus. The Syrian civil war is going into its fourth year and has claimed at least 120,000 lives. Below is Hanna's latest report via Open Doors contacts in Syria: (Satellite images show progression of destruction of whole neighborhoods/via Independent UK)

While I'm telling you this (Wednesday), we're in the middle of a bombing. My husband and two girls just saw one bomb falling down over 200 yards from our house. We hurried downstairs to be safer.

A mortar falling down sounds like a very strong voice near you; it's the same pressure. We don't know what will happen in five minutes, or even one minute. One moment you're here, the next moment you can be gone. A few days ago my relative was preparing Easter snacks in the kitchen when suddenly her life was over; a bomb fell through her apartment. We didn't find her body.

I want to tell you about Tuesday. It was a terrible day. We cried and prayed all day. Tuesday they were bombing Bab Touma, the old city of Damascus. A lot of Christians live there. There is also a Christian school -- a private one. We know a lot of people in that school. Some children from our area also go to school there.

When those kids went to school on Tuesday, gathered at the square like they always do, a mortar fell in their midst. Some friends passed by the school and saw that parents and teachers were carrying their wounded children out of the school, dripping with blood. They saw them running to the hospitals in panic. For me, as a mother and a teacher, I can hardly bear to imagine what these people must be going through right now.

Twelve people lost their lives in that school, most of them children from the elementary school. Many more of them have lost arms and legs or have other injuries. (Satellite images show progression of destruction of whole neighborhoods/via Independent UK)

In our school we gathered the children to pray for the victims. I told the children: no matter what bad things are happening around us, our God is still good; even if we're in danger of death, our God is still good and worthy of praise. So we raised our hands and started worshipping God. The parents of one of our Muslim pupils were present while we did that, and they were so impressed they said: "Our child is safe here. He is under the protection of God."

God is here, but I'm getting so tired. Tired of praying. Tired of crying. Sometimes it seems like there is no end to all this misery. I know God is in control, but sometimes I feel so hopeless. I regularly fall on my knees and cry out to Him about why all of this is happening.

I praise God that He is protecting me and my family. Prayer gives me strength; it's a weapon in the spiritual battle that's going on here.

Right now, I still hear mortars falling down, but a little further away. The place where the mortar came down near our house is still smoking. The people are already moving as usual on our street. Bombings are slowly becoming a normal part of our daily lives here. We live in such a strange time now, you can't imagine.