International researchers address first ever conference on Men and Abortion

Heather J. Austin : Jan 4, 2008
Men and Abortion

Consequences in the life of a man involved in abortion often cause collateral damage in his family, work, or his social contacts. However, according to the researchers it is rare that a prior abortion is factored into a present crisis of relationship or altered behavior.

(Anchorage, Alaska)—How do we bring about the restoration of fatherhood? That was the question on the mind of those from 28 states and nine countries, gathered in November, at St. Mary's Cathedral, San Francisco, for the first ever conference on the effects of abortion on men. With a review of traditional male roles including that of provider and protector, the "Reclaiming Fatherhood" conference began.

Research reflecting the extent of the father-loss crisis, along with new tools for those involved in the work of healing of post-abortive men, engaged the attention of the 170 psychotherapists, clergy, and lay counselors. Seven researcher/psychotherapists who treat male abortion-related issues presented the results of their years-long investigations along with newly developed therapies. What follows are some highlights of those findings.

Statistics reflect that one in four women have had an abortion. But abortion is not just a woman's issue; it also affects men. In 1981, the first clinical evidence of abortion-related trauma was presented before the U.S. Congress by Vincent Rue, Ph.D. At that time Dr. Rue showed a correlation between abortion's impact on men and relationships. Research now shows that boys, adolescents, and men need treatment for father loss issues as they, themselves, have been affected by the (emotional) loss of their fathers or of their fatherhood through abortion.

Consequences in the life of a man involved in abortion often cause collateral damage in his family, work, or his social contacts. However, according to the researchers it is rare that a prior abortion is factored into a present crisis of relationship or altered behavior. Dr. Rue pointed out that while men are less likely to seek help for emotional needs, seeing it as a sign of weakness; they often are forced to do so when faced with aberrant behaviors involving addictions, rage, or dangerous activity.

Andrzej Winkler, M.A., a Polish psychotherapist who has worked with patients throughout Eastern Europe, reports over a period of thirty years [concerning] his treatment of gynecologists and anesthesiologists seeking help due to major depression. To numb their emotional pain, these clients had become addicts, participated in knowingly high-risk activity, or attempted suicide. Intake interviews revealed that all had been or were presently involved in the abortion industry. Though they had not connected their emotional decline to their occupation, they had, on a subconscious level, become unable to live with themselves.

Research has also shown that men who have participated in abortion are more apt to have a diminished regard for women, and struggle with sexual addictions including a high use of pornography.

Another important aspect of this conference was recognition that there is a masculine side of healing.

Healing the wounds
Tom Golden, LCSW, illustrated the distinctive way by which males deal with trauma. While women gather to emote, men act. After receiving traumatic news, males will "work in the shop" or participate in some other action activity, alone or with other men. Treatment for men and boys dealing with trauma should therefore be geared for their understood needs and responses.

Documenting the range of responses men have to being casualties or having participated in the death of their unborn children, researcher and therapist Catherine Coyle, Ph.D., wrote Men and Abortion. She also created a successful model of "Forgiveness Therapy," which she described in detail. In recent years, medical literature has recognized that forgiveness has been shown to help in physical healing. Dr. Coyle has documented, by use of scientific measurement, before, during, and following forgiveness therapy, the transformative and healing effect (it) has for people who choose to forgive.

The Rev. Martin Pable, OFM Cap., a psychotherapist who counsels with many post-abortive men, has written a booklet for them. This simply written message offers hope for men who have recognized the dichotomy between their role to protect, and that by pressuring a woman into abortion, they caused the death of their child and harm to its mother. It speaks about God's forgiveness and the healing process. Fr. Pable also shows the need for healing and forgiveness for men who were helpless to prevent an abortion. These men often deal with a sense of emasculation or uselessness, not uncommon in Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).

Dr. Rue's statement of "how emotionally toxic abortion can be—a painful and unacknowledged traumatic loss—so much so that the 'A' word may be more difficult to talk about for men than for women," is reflected in research. Abortion is sufficiently traumatic that PTSD is a feature of some men's abortion response, manifesting differently for those who encouraged abortion, than for those who were helpless to prevent one.

Reclaiming their status as protectors was a common theme, as four men told of their healing following abortion. They spoke of their realization of what abortion had done, and of accepting forgiveness from God, and those whom they had harmed. Each man acknowledged at least one female friend who had encouraged him to talk about the abortion experience without fear of condemnation. These men now encourage others' healing.

Jesus said, "You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free." It was clear throughout the conference that understanding and facing the effects of abortion is a necessary step in seeking forgiveness, from which comes healing and freedom from its consequential emotional and spiritual captivity.

For more information, log onto the website for The National Office of Post-Abortion Reconciliation and Healing, Inc., at the link provided.

Heather J. Austin writes in Anchorage, AK, and worships at All Saints' Church. She has been involved in pro-life ministry for nearly 40 years. She helped co-found, and has been a facilitator and speaker for the Alaska chapter of Project Rachel, since its inception in 2002.