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How Jesus Transformed a Gay Man and a Lesbian Woman; Now They're Married—"I Thought Being Homosexual Was Unforgivable. But ... God Loved Me Also"

Mark Ellis : Oct 17, 2018
God Reports

"I had all these concerns, but after we got married, none of those fears became a reality. I really understood what it is to become one flesh. I didn't have guilt or shame ... it felt holy and right. I am fulfilled and my wife is fulfilled." -Ronald McCray

[God Reports] He was raised in the church with a surface knowledge of God, but did not have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. (Photo: Ronald McCray/via God Reports)

"At nine years old a close male relative and two male friends sexually abused me," says Ronald McCray, now 31. With a knife pointing in his direction, he was forced to participate. "My innocence was taken from me," he says.

The men were watching male-female porn, but acting it out with Ronald as their female prop. They made him keep silent about the abuse.

Ronald's father was absent from the home at times due to an addiction to drugs and alcohol.

"I guess I began to feel I wasn't worthy of his love. Any child wants to feel affirmed and loved by their father. A mom can do her best but she can't be a father," he says.

As a result of the trauma in his home, he isolated himself and became cold and distant toward others.

While mom was around, they didn't have the closest relationship. "There were certain things we didn't talk about," Ronald notes. Later, Ronald was able to reconcile with both parents and develop a closer relationship.

In grade school and middle school he first noticed a sexual attraction toward other boys, but suppressed the feelings.

At 15 he met a young man on social media and decided to give in to his same-sex attraction. "He was my first boyfriend. It was interesting because I knew it was wrong, but it felt so right," he recounts.

He continued to meet men online. One homosexual man claimed to be a Christian Believer. "He came across as kind and gentle, but he raped me."

The forcible sex had an unlikely outcome. "You will probably think that should have turned me away from men. Instead, it unlocked promiscuity in me. I began meeting other men on line. I wanted to be loved. I was seeking fulfillment, to fill the void. I thought giving my body away would buy me love."

Ronald battled depression and suicidal thoughts as he went from one relationship to another. "No matter who or what I did, something was missing," he says.

In 2004 his mother confronted him with her suspicions about a young man he was bringing to the house. "You are around this guy a lot ... are you gay?" she asked.

Ronald took a deep breath and confessed his secret, but he wasn't prepared for her reaction. She immediately assumed he was HIV positive and posed a risk to the family by sharing meals with them.

"Some of my family and friends turned their backs on me after I told them," he says. As a result, Ronald embraced the gay lifestyle and found a new family of sorts in the LGBT community. "I wore tight fitting clothing. It was a statement I made about how I carried myself. I lived the life, going to the parties and clubs, going to Gay Pride events."

"I continued in my same patterns of brokenness, pursuing love in all the wrong places," he recounts.

At 21 he shared an apartment with a young man who attended church frequently and invited Ronald to attend. Ronald was apprehensive, but finally gave in.

Something remarkable happened at that church. "The experience was the opposite of what I expected. They loved on me. They saw me as a human being."

The experience opened the door for Ronald to go back to the church where he was raised. Again, he was shocked by the friendly reception.

"My church family was very loving and embraced me. It helped to melt away some of the ice around my heart."

He thought homosexuality was the cardinal sin of the African American church. "They can be hard on men in that lifestyle. But the members loved me and changed my perception."

God continued to pursue Ronald. One day at the shoe store in Arlington, Virginia where he worked, he talked to a female co-worker. "We had grown up in the same church and she was backslidden, but ministered to me."

"Don't look to me as an example," she told him, "but Jesus loves you and can transform you."

"It reminded me that God loved me in spite of my sin. I thought being homosexual was unforgivable. But in that moment it reminded me that God loved me also. (Photo: Ronald McCray/via God Reports)

"It's amazing because from that point forward, God would send different people my way to remind me of His love."

One day in Waldorf, Maryland he ran into a young woman who attended his church. "I was flaming; it was so obvious I was gay. She ran up to me and put her arm around my waist. She told me how much God loved me."

A spiritual battle was waging within Ronald's heart. One night at a gay nightclub he was surprised when he heard the voice of God for the first time.

I have so much more for you, God impressed on his heart.

As he drove home from the club in the early morning hours, he looked out the window and felt the same message repeated: I have so much more for you.

Ronald began having dreams and visions about the return of Jesus Christ. He concluded that Jesus wanted him to be part of His family when He returns.

A couple weeks later, Ronald had a dramatic incident outside his home, on his way to a gay nightclub. "Four gunmen ran up and forced us on the ground. The guy put a gun on the back of my head and said, 'This is about to be a homicide.'"

Silently, Ronald pleaded with God for his life. He saw himself at the feet of Jesus.

I know I could go to Hell, but please give me another opportunity...

He was startled when suddenly one of his friends cried out, "Run Ron, run... Subscribe for free to Breaking Christian News here.

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